Learning How to Accept Yourself

Learning How to Accept Yourself

Avery Marchese, Writer

Learning how to accept yourself for who you really are, I think, is one of the hardest things a person can do.

If it’s with yourself and your family, friends, or your own identity, it’s okay to be in limbo for some time. Not knowing who you are can be okay sometimes, you just need to know soon you will be in the right direction. Self-acceptance is a journey that doesn’t have one set destination but rather stops along the way.

Ways to accept yourself 

  1. Forgive yourself for being who you are, don’t be guilty just because you are different 
  2. Don’t listen to your inner critic
  3. Love the things that set you apart from others
  4. Move on from disappointments
  5. Be surrounded by people who love the real you
  6. Acknowledge the things you are good at, and use them to your advantage rather than shining on the bad

Why is accepting yourself so hard?

Accepting yourself is sometimes a very hard thing to do because we as people are always changing. We want to fit in with the trends and be like everyone else in life. Relationships can identify with who you are, and after you lose one, you can feel empty without it. In addition to this, the school can lower your self-worth through grades and pressure to succeed. Once again, you need to accept yourself and accept the fact that people come and go, and some tests are harder than others. Trauma can also alter your self-worth, not knowing why you never feel enough, because in the trauma-related event you weren’t ever enough. In addition to this idea, things like impostor syndrome and dysmorphia can alter your self-acceptance. You need to learn to love yourself, your flaws, and your perfections. Everyone has something they are unhappy about themselves, but to really love yourself, you need to focus on the good. 

The difference in self esteem and self-acceptance

Self-esteem is confidence in what you are doing and comparing yourself to others. Self-acceptance however is a long timeless process that is truly only for you. No one can make you feel more accepted in your own body than yourself. 


How to start your journey of acceptance

Practice ways of self-care and forgiving yourself:

  1. If you have guilt towards people for an action you did, learn to take responsibility, but forgive yourself, because you can´t go into the past and change what happened.
  2. Self-compassion can help you understand some roots of your problems. Do self-care, put yourself in perspective to others, and enjoy some alone time
  3. Applaud your strong and amazing parts about yourself
  4. Don’t listen to negative thoughts towards yourself. No one should put you down, especially you.
  5. Don’t just settle, learn how to look past negatives


If you struggle with seeing the true you and accepting yourself, you need to be surrounded by support. Therapists, good trustworthy friends, and relatives can help make this enduring, timeless journey sail smoother. But overall, you need to surround yourself with a positive attitude about yourself internally. Self-acceptance is something a lot of people, in general, don’t ever want to face, but being positive about yourself is more worth pretending to be happy.  The world can’t accept you for who you are until YOU are comfortable in your own skin.

Sources: https://psychcentral.com/lib/ways-to-accept-yourself#summary

https://positivepsychology.com/self-acceptance/#:~:text=Self%Esteem%20reference%20to%20 how,you%20are%20who%20you%20are.